Freedom and A Little Something Left Over...That's All I Ever Wanted

[wlotus]

A young lady I used to mentor has taken on a "Queen" name and joined The Nation of Gods and Earths (also known as The Five Percenters). She seems happy in the photos and posts I have seen on her Myspace page, and she currently lives among other Five Percenters. While I do not embrace their beliefs, I respect and appreciate that this conversion appears to have given her a new focus and possibly raised her self-respect, at least from afar.

I asked her what drew her to that sect of Islam. She said she studied it for about a year before converting, and all of her questions were met with warmth, respect, and information. (The movement is big on black people having knowledge.) She found that was a sharp contrast to the, "It is so because I say so now stop questioning me and just believe!!!!" mentality she had encountered in the Black Pentecostal Christian movement she was raised in. I know that mindset all too well; it is part of what drove me from the movement, too. Being respected rather than treated like a pesky, unwanted child for daring to doubt is appealing. I am not surprised she was drawn in by that...and by the guy she is dating, ahem.

Where does this unwillingness to accept questioning come from in the black community? I think it is part cultural. People whose ancestry includes a few centuries of American slavery no doubt have passed down to their subordinates (whether their children or the membership of the churches they pastor) some of the same mentalities the slave owners beat into them. Questioning authority is frowned upon and, in some cases, is punishable by violence (verbal and/or physical). Believe what the master/mistress says, or at least put on a damn good act of doing so, simply because they said it. The maddening nature of those expectations was enough to make countless slaves risk their lives and the lives of their loved ones to escape. Many of us are still taking considerable (social and familial) risks to escape, today.

It is this desire to be free that may be driving my insistence that there is no true choice without justice, without an evening of the playing field. Mere survival--going along to get along, making so-called choices within the limits of the master-slave relationship--was not good enough for the slaves who escaped, and it is not good enough for me, either. I can do it to survive, but I don't expect to be happy doing it.

Comments

[iswari.livejournal.com]

I'd never heard of that sect. I'm not sure I understand how those professing to be following Islam would say that any person (regardless of color) is god/Allah? Or do they believe the traditional Islam/Qu'ran has got it wrong? Just curious.

Anyway, interesting post.

[aamusedinatx.livejournal.com]

Growing up in the Catholic and then Presbyterian churches I too was affronted and annoyed when I asked a question. I was berated and spoken to sharply, with a great deal of condescension for having the NERVE to question them, or authority, or the bible, or my study guides for catechism or just for Sunday school. To the point where my teacher dropped by our house unannounced the evening before I was to have my confirmation to suggest I was not prepared to accept God and the devil's work was too strong in me because for ever answer I received I had 5 more questions and until I learned to simply listen and accept what was said to me that I was un-prepared to take my place among the Godly.

So is this paranoid, authoritarian voice common through all sects of western religion? or just western christian religions? Certainly given my experience and yours I'm inclined to say yes.

[verucas-chaos.livejournal.com]

You ask really good questions here. I have thoughts, but I can't quite access them right now. More thought required...

[rockbirthedme.livejournal.com]

I'm guessing that, as you suggested above, you're getting a double whammy from coming from a Black, Christian community. Doubt is a very suspicious quality in Christianity, where faith is what gets you into the Elect. Let slaves question, and the first question is going to be, "Who gave you the right to make me a slave?" That stuff internalizes like mad.

And you're right, there is no true equality without the ability to question, and by questioning, get justice and level the playing field.

[caravel.livejournal.com]

I can't speak as to the Black Pentecostal Movement discouraging questions, since I don't know much about it.

I can say that I don't think the Black Pentecostal Movement is particularly special in discouraging questioning; lots of religious groups discourage questions from followers. (The Mormons come immediately to mind, as do some of the more vehement fundamentalist churches that I heard about growing up.)

On my cynical days, I think the 5% nation concept is about right, and that their population breakdown is accurate. On my REALLY cynical days, I think they've seriously overestimated the percentage of good people in the world.

I try to work on not being cynical.