Yesterday, I bought myself flowers.

Gerber Daisies

(no subject)

There could be drama, but I found healthy ways to handle my angst. I gave my bathroom a thorough cleaning. I updated my photoblog. I made some calls. I clipped the cats' nails. I rescheduled hanging out with a friend who had to tend to an emergency at work. I intend to go out to the park for a ride in a little while.

I feel much better.

I always get thrown for a loop when uncomfortable feelings descend upon me. My first instinct is to run in circles and scream and shout, and not in the virtual way I sometimes joke about with my friends. But this time I hung onto my sanity, remained (somewhat) grounded in the midst of the emotional storm, and it passed. Just like the sun must set every day, so must emotional storms play themselves out, at some point. The question is how much damage will I do in the process of my emotions playing themselves out?

This time, the answer is, "None," and for that I am grateful.

Sunset from the West Side
18 April 2008

Five Minutes After Burial

Like Aunt Mo, I will leave more behind me than this...

Aunt Mo's Grave
16 April 2008

It's stark. It's bare. It's plain. It's the real end. After 93 years, all it took was 5 minutes with a backhoe.

Think about that for a minute, will you?

A lot of stuff pales in comparison to that reality, when we keep that in mind. All of the words, all of the trying to prove one's point, all of the power-plays, all of the screaming, all of the trying to feel better than someone else, all of the trying to get them to stop screaming and understand you for once will all end here, no matter how the situation plays out. In the long run, all of that doesn't mean anything next to a filled-in, flattened down, six-foot-deep hole in the ground.

That thought makes it easy for me to walk away from some people, places, and things...and makes me intensely grateful for the ones who are left. :-)